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I Don't Crossfit

from A Narxist Critique by stoner will & the narks

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  • T-Shirt/Apparel

    quiet down the decibels, intercept the audio,
    move around the decimals, everything's a radio!
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  • Poster/Print

    this 11"x17" double-sided semi-gloss beauty showcases your favorite stoner and narks just hanging out in the waters of the times on one side, with your favorite dolphin swimming through a sea of deliberately difficult-to-catch lyrics revealed to all on the other. lyrics of every song on the album immortalized in full!

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  • you know you're thinking about it... the proverbial shit and the fan
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lyrics

I don’t crossfit, I’m not trying to get swole to win a fight. And the geniuses in the cockpit are always bringing a SWAT team to a knife fight. And all you professional yuppies have never read my blog. You’re too busy jogging and drinking craft beer with your dogs. And all you paid protestors get paid to like my band. If you listen in real close you can hear the money changing hands.

I don’t throw shade, at least I’m not a Senator’s aide. That shit’s above my paygrade, but at least I’m not above throwing shade. I’m just writing down contradictions because they’re part of my artistic vision. And all my selfish decisions are uninhibited by long division. And I'm not calculating when I use a calculator. And I drown out all my shit with chorus and fader.

All my bosses crossfit (so weird). Is it something about power I don’t understand? And heavyweights in the mosh pit are working through a complex about an all male eighties band. And all you grown up hippies covering your problems with tapestries. And pivoting to the right to the siren song of complicity. I’ll ask anyone with a pulse to please send money to my mailing list. And we can all shake hands, subsist, and pretend to make progress.

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from A Narxist Critique, released October 15, 2021

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stoner will & the narks Hadley, Massachusetts

the favorite band of bots and paid protestors.

brian
steph
will
anya

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